VLADRUSHKA by John Linton Roberson (c) 2022.
I Didn't Write That!
26 March 2011
  Vladrushka Pinup #2: Encourage Literacy (NSFW)

UPDATE: Now available as a print (and other stuff) at Deviantart. Buy here.

Pinup #1 can be found here. Here, Vladrushka enjoys the delights of reading, while Berlin has her nose deeply into things as well. All quite innocent, as always.

One of my few fully-inked pieces in a while, on Crescent board, 11"x15". Zero digital except scanning. You can buy the original here at Sketchmaven.

Buy the original here!

Click image for larger version. (nsfw)

Side note: If it looks like I have her near pools a lot, blame that, besides Georgina Spelvin and one other, one of the primary physical inspirations for Vladrushka was one Joan Severance, an exquisitely beautiful Texas model(also an actress, who you might recall in WISEGUY and RED SHOE DIARIES, among much else) who appeared in these photos here, among many others.

This, plus Georgina, plus Petra Verkaik, plus a leg tattoo on a woman I once knew, plus my strange fascination with the aesthetics of all things Soviet, plus the way a Serbian director I knew spoke English, created Vladrushka, pretty much.


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20 March 2011
  Obama: Just Take It, Voters

Obama is doing everything he can to dare his voters to not vote for him again, and it's abusive. "What are you going to do, vote against me?" you can almost hear him saying.

I want this bastard primaried so badly. But what do we have? Hillary, whose idea this new war is?

And what else can we do, except throw our vote away on some nonviable third party?

Obama can always depend on the fact that we actually have no party, but no matter how much a doorman for the GOP he is, we do not want to actually put the presidency directly in Republican hands again. But at the same time, in substance, what's the difference been?

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19 March 2011
  Tepco Are Negligent Murderers

From the Wall Street Journal:
The plant's operator—Tokyo Electric Power Co., or Tepco—considered using seawater from the nearby coast to cool one of its six reactors at least as early as last Saturday morning, the day after the quake struck. But it didn't do so until that evening, after the prime minister ordered it following an explosion at the facility. Tepco didn't begin using seawater at other reactors until Sunday.

Tepco was reluctant to use seawater because it worried about hurting its long-term investment in the complex, say people involved with the efforts. Seawater, which can render a nuclear reactor permanently inoperable, now is at the center of efforts to keep the plant under control.

Tepco "hesitated because it tried to protect its assets," said Akira Omoto, a former Tepco executive and a member of the Japan Atomic Energy Commission.

Tepco prevented a measure which might have arrested this horrible situation earlier. We don't know if it would have stopped the current slow-motion disaster, but we'll never know if it wouldn't, either. But because of a corporation's wish to protect its property, how many are dying now and will die in days, months, years to come? How much cumulative damage will be done to Japan, and eastern Russia, and Korea, and China alone, not to mention the effect of those rads being vomited in a steady stream into our atmosphere?

A little uranium twinkling in every lung.

All because of a company's negligence, even leaving aside how we don't learn the lesson of not doing things we don't know how to fix when they go wrong. Things that, when they go wrong, go wrong all the way. Because of money. Because of profit.

Not yours.

The profit of the corporations, the legal fictions we have given the powers of God and the legal standing of human beings. But none of the same liability.

Indeed, the whole purpose of corporations is evasion of individual liability. But it seems you cannot have your cake and eat it too.

That has started to break down of late, with the Supreme Court's surprisingly intelligent decision(dissented by Thomas and Scalia, of course) against AT & T, declaring that the corporation did not have the same right to privacy as an individual does. There's a next logical step, though.

Because corporations murder. They destroy lives, property, and resources. Before this, there was BP and the Gulf. Oil companies, for decades. Union Carbide in Bhopal. R.J. Reynolds and others. All engaged in irresponsible behavior that cost the lives of millions. That's not even including corporations such as ITT, DeBeers, or United Fruit that actively killed people and overthrew nations and governments.

Some have paid fines. Occasionally executives have gone to jail. But mostly, the corporations remain and find new ways to commit the same crimes. And they usually don't really have to fix what they destroyed, or pay for it.

The paying is usually left to the victims.

Why should they have all the advantages of an individual with none of the responsibilities to the human race?

Bad enough we can never hold God to account. But to actually create and tolerate such a malign force within our own world, created by our own laws, which protect it as it murders us?

It seems to me that in some way, should a corporation commit murder and mass destruction, it should be imprisoned, even executed, as any individual might, as well.

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12 March 2011
  The Problem With Newt Gingrich's Raging, Throbbing Patriotism

Newt Gingrich's rather passionate reaction to America, as he told us in his Penthouse Letter he kindly read on CBN for Pat Robertson this week, could hamper him were he president.

If actually in the Oval Office, patriotism will keep him from ever getting things done.

I mean, it made Nixon start talking to the paintings--what would Gingrich do, once left alone in there, the very philosophic and historical center of the nation that makes such powerful forces rush forth from him?

Just think, as the history rushes to Gingrich's loins. He'll just be shaking there all day, coming and coming with no blood to his brain.

While Clinton managed to broker mideast peace on the phone while getting a blowjob, according to the Starr Report. Beat that.

But no, given he lacked, as the GOP would tell us, the extra trait of patriotism, of course he could split his attention.

Newt & Calista Gingrich: They're imagining new pleasure orifices to carve into you.

But not Newt.

Newt cares just a little too much.

Even a woman, even ten, even watching his wife have sex with, then slit the throats of, each as he finishes with them(not that I suggest it's impossible they already do this), would not be enough to contain him, as the problems of the US consumed him less than its hope, its majesty, its tits.

Newt would just writhe there on the rug, like a human test subject for Viagra, convulsing and ejaculating till dehydrated, and till there wasn't even blood anymore.

We do not want a man who will get the Gush, god forbid.

We cannot do this to Newt. Don't ever vote him in. You'll kill him if you do.


MARTHA on sale now!THIS SICKNESS #6 with LULU and GLASS HOUSE on sale now!


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  A Note To Bill Keller and All Non-Fox Media


Sorry for being loud, but I believe they're deaf.

A basic thing to remind Keller, Obama, NPR and all others who give too much to these people before they even conceivably have to:


Applicable to almost anything. Sadly.

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10 March 2011
  Gang of Four: "Capital(It Fails Us Now)" and "The Republic"

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  Charlie Sheen: What Winning Means

I get it now! Charlie Sheen has a nervous tic and when he says "win" he actually means "die," but the drugs short-circuited that part of his brain in this most amusing way.

It is good TV.

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  Godspeed! You Black Emperor: "Dead Flag Blues"

An elegy for the beginning of this century, when we cannot wait to chew our own heart out.

The car is on fire, and there's no driver at the wheel
And the sewers are all muddied with a thousand lonely suicides
And a dark wind blows

The government is corrupt
And we're on so many drugs
With the radio on and the curtains drawn

We're trapped in the belly of this horrible machine
And the machine is bleeding to death

The sun has fallen down
And the billboards are all leering
And the flags are all dead at the top of their poles

It went like this:

The buildings tumbled in on themselves
Mothers clutching babies
Picked through the rubble
And pulled out their hair

The skyline was beautiful on fire
All twisted metal stretching upwards
Everything washed in a thin orange haze

I said, "Kiss me, you're beautiful -
These are truly the last days"

You grabbed my hand
And we fell into it
Like a daydream
Or a fever

We woke up one morning and fell a little further down
For sure it's the valley of death

I open up my wallet
And it's full of blood
(c)1997 Godspeed You! Black Emperor


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09 March 2011
  Wisconsin Today: Fascism In Business Suits?

Today was the 78th anniversary of the inception of the New Deal.

I have this weird urge to re-read Jason Lutes' Berlin.

Perhaps this is what it looks like, when it starts. When the Wisconsin GOP, out of panic, or maybe, impatience, openly violated their own Open Meetings Law and pushed through the union-breaking law, without debate, in an insane yelling match.

The Wisconsin GOP seems to have decided, we're tired of pretending we respect the law, and we will hammer that square peg into the round hole till it breaks. We will get what we want and fuck you.

They seem to think they've only been nice in abiding within the law, and viscerally moral human conduct as civil representatives. How then do they act when they're not pretending, if this has been pretending till now?

Do these little men really feel that emboldened to go there? Then again, it's always the little men you have to watch in such things.

And Rachel: I said a few things last night on Twitter about you declaring Walker's opposition won last night. What did I say? That you should never declare victory UNTIL YOU'VE WON? Well.

Is that a big iron toe I see testing the water? Does it feel like an itch traveling up the leg?

What the GOP is doing in WI, MI, and so many other states is a legislative coup against the people of those states.

Today's politics is like Lord of the Flies. Mother and Father are long gone, there is no adult and no one to decide punishment. And the side that likes to break things are the ones with the weapons and will to do it. All the fat kids have sticks.

It cannot be possible that this is not illegal. But for some reason they no longer seem to think they should care. Imagine what Nixon could do now. Don't say he was liberal by comparison. He wasn't. These are his politics on top. Pure bully.

And the GOP's opposition brings lemonade to nuke fights until they realize the world has fallen out under them. And still they expect the Republicans to not then kick their fingers. Or stomp.

We're now living in the Simpsons. We're all done now, pretty soon. But it's been a long time since America was other than a trademark.

What does it look like when the stuff people stopped talking about because it sounded crazy sneaks into truth?

And where is Obama in all this? Where he was in Illinois, as anyone who lived there (me, for one) when he did knows: living in terror the Republicans will catch him on film standing for something.

Apart simply from his tactical use in keeping the GOP out of the White House: At this point Obama "fan" would have to be the word, not "supporter." Because, what with his lack of action here, forget Libya, and his restart of Gitmo, if one still can love him, it's more like a teen has posters.

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  The Vicious, Unfounded Accusations That James O'Keefe Rapes Hamsters

Rumors can be deadly things if you don't deny them proactively.

Here's an example. Some say James O'Keefe likes to behead hamsters after raping them. Some say he prefers to do so before. Others say he doesn't behead them at all. These are all awful things to say, as are the rumors he's a furry and his favored costume is that of a French poodle.

When will he address this?

If I were James O'Keefe, I'd sure want to deny raping hamsters. But he doesn't. Seems suspicious to me. In fact, I haven't heard O'Keefe even mention the accusations of hamster rape. What has he got to hide?

The very worst part is the nature of the alleged victims. Hamsters could never confirm nor deny James O'Keefe raped them, even if it was 12 in 1 night.They're hamsters. They can't talk. But people? Oh, they can.

O'Keefe raping hamsters is a horrid image. No one should picture it. Yet they have to, because of loose and unsubstantiated talk. You'd almost start to think there might be something to it.

Seems strange to me, but I'm not him. I guess he knows what he's doing.

Opinions differ. Let's teach the controversy.

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07 March 2011
  America Will Get Worse Before...It Gets Even Worse.

Okay, here's how it is. Enough bullshit.

The Democrats are about to return to Wisconsin, and Walker will end up getting to break the unions. I fully expect Rachel Maddow to somehow spin this as a moral victory. I like her but tell me you can't see that coming. Why she doesn't add pom-poms to such moments I do not know.

Obama just offered even deeper budget cuts than the GOP, which they will certainly take. And then will turn around and call him a communist and take all the credit, which he will gladly default to them.

Here's how it is, everyone. They will keep winning, the GOP. The Democrats will keep letting them win, while pretending to us somehow they're putting up some kind of fight.

Things will get worse, keep getting worse. No one will stop it because no one with any power cares to. This is because the real three classes in this country are the business class, the political class, and everyone else. And the interests of the first two are the same, and that goes for both D and R.

If somehow they eliminated the need for voting, the third class might as well disappear for all they care.

Neither side is ours. The GOP does as it likes, and the Democrats hold us down for them, while tut-tutting the whole time. Such a shame, but gosh darn it, those nasty Republicans just won't play fair! But who else will you vote for?

And it's true. Who else? You could throw your vote away on a protest. And that accomplishes absolutely naught. Except maybe a moment of empty satisfaction. Because there IS no viable third alternative. And there will not be either.

Things will get worse, and they will not get better. We are trapped in a decaying corpse.

Here is our new national anthem.

UPDATE: Walker threatened to arrest the Democratic senators should they cross state lines. Bad strategy. They're staying. So this is still on.

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05 March 2011
  Huckabee Puts His Worst Foot Forward Right Into His Mouth

Huckabee's attack on women who choose to have kids without marriage: that worked great for Quayle, didn't it?

I wonder, once he's done with the hated Natalie Portman, who of course is Hollywood's least beloved, least honored, and least popular actress, will he kick our real enemy, the puppies, next?

It'd be just as attractive to the public.

And say, I wonder then, does he think it's perfectly okay for Bristol Palin?

Silence. Surprise!

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  And Now We Ask: Don't Teachers Need A Kicking?

Have we really come to a point, with all the unpunished wreckers of the US, that we've decided the answer is to take a final shit on teachers? Is this the ancient sacrificial impulse as it looks in real life--let's destroy the weakest and all others will be cleansed?

I don't think I like much about this country anymore. Except that much of it's damn pretty.

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04 March 2011
  Charlie Sheen: Spoiler Alert

"Warlock 7 gram rock TIGER BLOOD GUH GK GH"

...and that's when his eyes rolled all the way back in his head and the foam, the endless foam, poured from his mouth onto the carpet in a miasma of blood and something that might have been vomit had he eaten for the past three weeks.

"God?" he asked the light as it suddenly flared.

"There is no god," it said. "I'm just a hallucination."

And as the last neuron faded out, he felt happy in the knowledge there was none higher than he.


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03 March 2011
  Captain Obvious Has A New Documentary For Us

Oh boy! New Morgan Spurlock coming! The genius that figured out if you eat McDonald's every day you get fat has another innovative expose for us? Can't wait.

I can't even count how many people I've met who like to self-righteously quote his film as though this was news. I had a better solution: never walk into McDonald's. But I didn't need to make a movie. I just needed to know McDonald's tastes like crap & I knew that at the age of 8.

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02 March 2011
  Shame on Huffpo: Obscenities in Titles!

I go to Huffington Post and what do I see but this headline:

Fox News Suspends Contracts Of Newt Gingrich And Rick Santorum

It's not that these two reptiles are running for president that appalls me so much as the filth in that title. Children should not be exposed to words like "Santorum" or "Gingrich."

The latter? You haven't heard of it? Well, I guess I have no choice but to explain.

"Gingrich.­" A suppurating skin condition caused by unprotecte­d sex with open bullet wounds.

Now you know. Do NOT spread any links to this definition here about for people to come here and read it, and certainly don't start using the word with that definition. And don't even think about Googlebombing it till it's all over the place.

Such things can spread very, very fast, much like Gingrich itself. Don't. Just. Don't.


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01 March 2011
  Qaddafi, Walker & Sheen: A Pestilence of Fevered Egos

A useful term made famous by Bill Hicks is "fevered egos."(or as we once called them, assholes)

That seems to be the dominant current in the world today, which can't lead to anything good. Do you see a sort of pattern here?

We have the monstrous version, Qaddafi, willing to kill every one of his own people to protect himself, and insisting--and, I'm sure, believing--they all love him.

We have the domestic version, Governor Scott Walker of Wisconsin, willing to break his state in half to repay his Koch donors and use his state as the first kill in the Republican union hunt. His state is against him, the protests get bigger every day, and he thinks he's Reagan. He thinks this is his "moment." I'm sure he honestly tells himself most of the WI protesters are from out of state.

And then we have the clown version, celebrated crackhead Charlie Sheen, who believes making sure to only do crack off the set passes for responsible behavior, who unashamedly abuses women, who publicly hurls anti-semitic insults at his boss, who speaks of it all as his "bitchin' rock star life," and tells us he's tired of pretending he's not special. And who thinks the entire world can't see the deep mark of crack right there on his face, thick as Robert Downey Jr. in the interviews among the extras in the Natural Born Killers DVD.(go back and look at his face, then look at Sheen's. That was Downey at rock bottom)

Incidentally, I think he and Qaddafi, from the sound of both of them, have the same dealer.

Basically, destructive, delusional, selfish porky people who will do anything to achieve a purpose that everyone but they consider wrong. Qaddafi will kill you. Walker will fire you. And Sheen will sue you till there's a greasy spot. None care about the consequences of their actions to others, and in fact are quite happy to hurt others. All are in a state of delusion but in a position where it's almost impossible to stop them. And if everyone is against them? They will destroy everyone.

It's a current. It's a symbol. It's a picture of our lousy time. A pestilence of fevered egos, corroding our souls.

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"Eternity in the company of Beelzebub, and all of his hellish instruments of death, will be a picnic compared to five minutes with me & this pencil."
--E. Blackadder, 1789

JLRoberson Self-Portrait 2005.
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