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I Didn't Write That!
29 November 2008
 
WTF: A Gun Commercial on TV?

On channel 7.2 (digital) in Seattle, just a moment ago, was an advertisement for Henry Guns(as in the Henry repeating rifle). It struck me because, well...I cannot recall ever having seen an ad for firearms on TV.

Uh, if it's illegal to advertise cigarettes on TV, wouldn't it make sense that it be illegal to advertise freaking guns?

I'm now curious and want to look into this. Perhaps more later.

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28 November 2008
  "Let Not Mankind Bogart Love"

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27 November 2008
  I Stand Corrected

Turns out Reaganomics actually worked! It's just that, like all that is truly wondrous, it took time.

The $10 began its long journey into Kellener's wallet in 1983, when a beefed-up national defense budget of $210 billion enabled the military to purchase advanced warhead-delivery systems from aerospace manufacturer Lockheed. Buoyed by a multimillion-dollar bonus, then-CEO Martin Lawler bought a house on a 5,000-acre plot in Montana. When a forest fire destroyed his home in 1986, Lawler took the federal relief check and invested it in a savings and loan run by a Virginia man named Michael Webber. After Webber's firm collapsed in 1989, and he was indicted on fraud and conspiracy charges, he retained the services of high- powered law firm Rabin & Levy for his defense. After six years and $7 million in legal fees, Webber received only a $250,000 fine, and the defense team went out to celebrate at a Washington, D.C.-area restaurant called Di Forenza. During dinner, lawyer Peter Smith overheard several investment bankers at an adjoining table discussing a hot Internet start-up that was about to go public. Smith took a portion of his earnings from the Webber case and bought several hundred shares in Gadgets.com, quadrupling his investment before selling them four months later. Gadgets.com's two founders used the sudden influx of investment capital to outfit their office with modern Danish furniture, in a sale brokered by the New York gallery Modern Now! in 1998. After the ensuing dot-com bust, Modern Now! was forced out of business, and Sotheby's auction house was put in charge of liquidating its inventory. The commission from that auction enabled auctioneer Mary Schafer to retire to the Ozark region of Missouri in 2006. Last month, while passing through Hazelwood, she took her Audi to Marlin Car Wash, where Kellener was one of the employees who tended to her car. She was so satisfied with the job that she left a $50 tip, which the manager divided among the people working that day.

...Kellener, who has cared for his schizophrenic sister ever since her federally funded mental institution was closed in 1984, said that he plans to donate the full $10 to the Republican presidential candidate who best embodies Reagan's legacy.

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25 November 2008
  Gold Diggers Hit Hard Times

It's a difficult time to be a money-grubbing tart. Perhaps they might try their hand at working for their own keep, as so many other women do.

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  Ah, Sweet Justice

Ann Coulter's jaw is wired shut.

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23 November 2008
 
S. Clay Wilson Out of ICU

Thankfully, cartoonist S. Clay Wilson is out of ICU and recovering from his recent injuries. A great relief, but he's still in the hospital and recovering. (updated to reflect corrected info since last post; see comments)

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  Lou Reed: "Magic & Loss(the Summation)"


When you pass through the fire
you pass through humble
You pass through a maze of self doubt
When you pass through humble
the lights can blind you
Some people never figure that out
You pass through arrogance you pass through hurt
You pass through an ever present past
and it's best not to wait for luck to save you
Pass through the fire to the light

As you pass through the fire
your right hand waving
there are things you have to throw out
That caustic dread inside your head
will never help you out
You have to be very strong
'cause you'll start from zero
over and over again
And as the smoke clears
there's an all consuming fire
lying straight ahead

They say no one person can do it all
but you want to in your head
But you can't be Shakespeare
And you can't be Joyce

so what is left instead
You're stuck with yourself
and a rage that can hurt you
You have to start at the beginning again
And just this moment
This wonderful fire started up again

When you pass through humble
when you pass through sickly
When you pass through
I'm better than you all
When you pass through
anger and self deprecation
and have the strength to acknowledge it all
When the past makes you laugh
and you can savor the magic
that let you survive your own war
You find that that fire is passion
and there's a door up ahead not a wall

As you pass through fire as you pass through fire
trying to remember its name
When you pass through fire licking at your lips
you cannot remain the same
And if the building's burning
move towards that door
but don't put the flames out
There's a bit of magic in everything
and then some loss to even things out

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20 November 2008
  Sarah Palin and the Slaughtered Turkey:This Woman Needs Her Own Comedy Show

I'm thinking something like I'm Alan Partridge. This video was taken today of ol' Barbie when she was in Wasilla to pardon a turkey. Then she carries on this TV interview chirpy as ever, unaware of the turkeys being beheaded behind her.


Palin really has absolutely no idea of how she looks, or what irony is, does she? Please, God, let her be the Republican candidate in 2012...

___________________

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18 November 2008
  Ted Stevens Has LOST

And on his 85th birthday, too. Ahhh...

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  Cheney Indicted

No, seriously. By Texas.

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17 November 2008
  Fist Jab Girl Gone

Fox NewsBlonde E.D. Hill, who was the one with the "terrorist fist jab"(what did that even mean?) remark, has not had her contract renewed by Fox News.

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  S. Clay Wilson In Critical Condition

Horrible news: seminal underground cartoonist S. Clay Wilson, 67, was found unconscious with a mysterious massive head injury in San Francisco a little over a week ago.

At last report he was still unconscious in the ICU, five days on.
For what they're worth, my best wishes for his recovery.



 
 
Obama's Bar

When watching this clip:

...I was struck most by Maher's remark about how used we are now to having a president who's so much stupider than all of us. And what was our reaction to having such a president? Well, over time we learned to accept just about anything he did. Kind of like Bush was the weather. We gave up in frustration and became content to mock him toothlessly for his idiotic acts and speech. But it was never seriously considered that these might in themselves be disqualifications, even leaving aside the entire illegal nature of his presidency and its inception(we've been under occupation for nearly 8 years, and there's no sense describing it any other way anymore).

Obama's bar of success is a pretty low one. I was struck too along these lines by both the reaction to his lack of fuck-ups during his campaign, and to his and his wife's very normal demeanor in their 60 Minutes interview last night. The consensus appears to be an amazement at--what? That Obama is a normal, intelligent human being? That his understanding what most sensible people do about what's wrong with this country, and what is really important, makes him a genius?

When did it become a surprising thing to have a recognizable, competent human adult as our leader? Isn;t that how it's supposed to be? How much of a spell have the Bush gang had us under all this time?

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16 November 2008
  "Split: A Divided America"

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  Not the Nine O'Clock News: "Game For a Laugh"

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15 November 2008
  Watch It Quick 79


Videos tu.tv


Videos tu.tv

Videos tu.tv


Videos tu.tv

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14 November 2008
  John Cale on "I've Got A Secret"

How very bizarre. (Hat tip to Eddie Campbell; check out the post as it has a number of scanned pages from Cale's autobio, illustrated by Dave McKean)


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  Bush's Legacy and Influence

His leadership example has already been looked to by world leaders:

With Russian tanks only 30 miles from Tbilisi on August 12, Mr Sarkozy told Mr Putin that the world would not accept the overthrow of Georgia, Mr Levitte said.

"I am going to hang Saakashvili by the balls," Mr Putin replied.

Mr Sarkozy responded: "Hang him?"

"Why not? The Americans hanged Saddam Hussein," said Mr Putin.

Mr Sarkozy replied, using the familiar "tu": "Yes but do you want to end up like (President) Bush?"

Mr Putin was briefly lost for words, then said: "Ah, you have scored a point there."

Update: Video.


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13 November 2008
  In The Know: Should The Government Stop Dumping Money Into A Giant Hole?

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  Square Pegs: Episodes 1/4-5


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  Picket Fences: Episode 2-5

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12 November 2008
  Enjoy Forgetting What It's Like To Have A President Who Talks Like This

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  Aww, No More Midget Humor?

Everyone's favorite black hole of humor has finally been cancelled: MAD TV is going off the air.

I wasn't even aware it was still on the air...

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  Square Pegs: 1-2/1-3


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  Picket Fences: Season 2, Ep. 3-4


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  Happy Tree Friends: "Hear Today, Gone Tomorrow"

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11 November 2008
  Monty Python: "Expedition to Lake Pahoe"

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  TIME Q & A's Dave Gibbons

Here.

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  Square Pegs 1-1

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  Obama Collects Comics

Okay, I like him a lot now.

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10 November 2008
  Picket Fences: Season 2 Episode 1-2


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  The Covert Bailout

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  Says It All

(Click image to expand.)


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  "What Is It To You?'

Olbermann on California's loathsome Prop 8.

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08 November 2008
  "Racism Ends Forever"

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  Now You Can Find Him Likeable Again

Because, to be honest, the man knows how to deliver a joke.

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  Bill Hicks: "Artistic Roll Call"


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  "Glorifying the American Girl" (1929)

No, that's not colorized.

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  Theme For The New Era

A suggestion.


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  Herzog's New Show About Antarctica

Penguins have crazed loners, and hookers!

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  This Week's Stupid Comics: The Modniks!

When it comes to generic and crappy comics parents gave to their kids because they didn't know any better and no others were sold at the airport on their way back into town, nobody could beat Gold Key.


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06 November 2008
  Your Daily Colbert Sandwich: The Day After


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05 November 2008
  One Last Time: Savor This

She's going away!
Watch this video below, one last time, and really, really enjoy what the American people just prevented. And that it turns out our vote still does matter and that the Republicans cannot win except when they cheat, and sometimes not even if they try. That some things still belong to us, and that some things still matter to all of us, and the vile people in this country that Sarah Palin dragged whooping into the light are just the loud ones. And some things are much louder than rebel yells, and some things are just too big to stop.

This is what we prevented, this person, the candidate of the Fox News audience, this synthetic empty dress(es), this worst of all combinations, a borderline sociopathic personality combined with near-total ignorance and incuriosity. For instance, it turns out, among other things, she thought Africa was just one country. Think of what that implies, that she thought somewhere was one single country where all the black people had come from.

But the fact is that it wasn't ever really funny, except in that she was going down to defeat. Because stupid people, as we know, can do a lot of damage, and stupid and petty are not a good combination in a world leader. Such as her stance against freedom of the press, culminating in a moment even Nixon would not have dared. Look at it now--the last dry hack of bile from a dead monster.

She may not have meant it as a joke, but now it's so very, very funny whether she meant it that way or not.

Bye, Barbie. And just think, you're going back in winter. To a family you readily exploited, with a pregnant daughter who may not be so keen on being forced to marry at 17, whose name you destroyed and privacy you wrecked just to help you fail on a grand scale. Surely this cursed you from the start, and if there had been anything great about you it'd be tragic. And I do pity your children. But not you. Go back, and freeze.

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Republicans Start Eating Each Other, and I Couldn't Care Less

Now they're losers, and realizing it. So of course they must find a scapegoat, as it could never be the fault of their whole party's crimes for the last 8 years.

Like I give a shit. I'm sick of thinking about them and it's over. I have spent most of those 8 years trying to help get them removed. Now they're done, and so am I. I said that if Obama won I'd lay off writing about politics for a while.

And so I will, breathing the greatest of sighs of relief. Go back to Hell, elephants. You're out of our way now. You won't be missed.

Except one thing: I must give thanks to John McCain, for an incredibly gracious concession speech, for showing no signs of being obstructionist against Obama(I see that as more possibly Lieberman, but time will take care of him as well), but most especially--for running the single shittiest campaign I've seen in my nearly 40 years on this planet, and I cannot believe it wasn't on purpose. Especially for picking Sarah Palin. Thank you for making the end of your party as easy as possible. You should, however, probably say sorry to all the rednecks in Appalachia who thought you were being serious.

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Another Asshole To Say Goodbye To

Nader sticks his head out of his hole and calls Obama an "Uncle Tom." But I guess it sucks being completely irrelevant. Bye, Ralph. Say hello to the Trivial Pursuit box.

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  Oh What A Beautiful Morning



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04 November 2008
  Obama Wins the Presidency

History is made. The good kind for once.



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  MSNBC Live Election Coverage

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  Spider Jerusalem Tells You To Fucking Vote

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03 November 2008
 
Palin Threatens To Revoke NBC's Broadcast License

NBC is running a collection of their skits for this campaign season, still on here on the West Coast. Of course these include their sketches making fun of Sarah Palin. They've also had new bits with the presidential candidates, or at least just McCain & Palin so far, speaking in between, as well as SNL cast members portraying them (In the latter case, Clinton & Edwards).

About 10 minutes ago was Sarah Palin, the actual one. And halfway through she changed from being more or less a good-natured good sport about it and, in a tone of voice that was anything but good-natured, or joking, said that once she's sworn in on January 20, she will try to get NBC's broadcast license revoked. This was not put in any way one could call a joke. It was a direct threat, of a kind one probably sees more often in South American countries. Venezuela, say.


I wonder if she realizes that she might be the first vice-presidential candidate to directly threaten a broadcast organization, or how stupid it is to do it the day before the election while they still have the power to report. I wonder if she realizes this only makes those she frightens more motivated to vote against her tomorrow. And finally, I wonder if she realizes how much, between this and her remarks the other day that press criticism of her is a violation of her first amendment rights, this reveals about her petty, quasi-fascist views of how government should be run. I wonder when this was taped.

Perhaps she felt she could slip this through here and be able to later claim that, because it's SNL, of course she was joking.

In any case, even more reason to vote against her. She's not just laughable. She is vindictive and does not like being laughed at.

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"A Vote For My Husband Is A Vote For Me Not Breaking Your Fucking Neck"

Cindy McCain continues her charm offensive.

I'd like to take this time to urge all of you to put "Country First" and cast your vote for my husband, John McCain! Because a vote for John McCain is not just a vote for experience, fortitude, and American values, it's also a vote for me, Cindy McCain, not tearing your ribcage open and spilling your steaming viscera into the street.

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  Cream: "Politician" and "N.S.U."



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02 November 2008
  "Grindhouse"--The Fake Trailers

If you haven't seen Death Proof or Planet Terror, incidentally, you're missing out.

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01 November 2008
  The Highly Informed & Reasonable McCain Voter


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  Hammer Them Nails!

Cheney endorses McCain & Palin, and only Obama publicizes it. Wonder why?

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"Eternity with Beelzebub, and all his hellish instruments of death, will be a picnic compared to five minutes with me and this pencil." - E. Blackadder, 1791
JLRoberson Self-Portrait 2005.
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